regrets
Its been some time since i last blogged. Thats because my cable internet kicked the bucket a couple of weeks back, couldn't pay the bills so got cutted off.. ahh.... so got to rely on my sis's laptop to log on to the internet wirelessly. (By being a parasite, we logged on to some neighbour's wireless network.. so its free internet for now.. :P)
At different points of life, we sometimes do things that we regret later on, but i don't think i have done something i have regreted before.. but however there were many occasions that i regret not doing something. Like on this fateful day in Sept 2004 in BMTC sch 2 pegasus company platoon 2 office. It was the final interview for all recruits to finally decide where they might be posted to after BMT. This was roughly the conversation between my pc and me at the moment.. to the best of my memory.. no flavouring of any kind.
PC: I find that your character is quite good, your peer appraisal is ok.. i'm pushing you for Sispec and even better OCS. Do you want to go?
Me: No sir, i don't want to go to both.
PC: Why?
Me: Sir, I'm very sick of the army and i hate field camp.
PC: How come? Don't you like camping?
Me: Yes Sir, but not when i have to wake up so early every morning..can't bath for days .. hug a rifle to sleep.. at least during school camp, i can do anything i want.. wake up anytime and there are girls.. :)
PC: *rolls eyeballs* Knock it down and give me 20!!
Me: *scrambles to pushup position* One Sir! .. Two Sir! .... Three Sir... !
Well.. the rest is history.
Being at Alex's commissioning parade really invokes some nostalgic memories. I saw my primary sch friends..my poly coursemates.. my BMT platoon mates.. all of them commissioned as officers. How about me? When people's expectations was that i would make it to OCS and be an officer, i chose to bug out. I had to reply No.
Sometimes, i just really look down on myself.. why did i made that decision? At most points of my life, i was either indecisive or made wrong decisions.. or i just can't remember the times i really made good decisions.
Looking at the commisioning parade... slow march into the audience at the tune of auld lang syne.. fixing on of officer's epaulettes.. tossing of peak caps.. .... the point where i really felt at a loss for words was when i was shaking my BMT platoon mates' hands.. seeing their jubilant faces.. ... when i could be one of them at that point of time if i had chosen to said yes.
To the commissioned officers of 57/04, best wishes and esprit de corps. Sirs.
From your obedient soldier.
